Unthinkable Thoughts
These thoughts, these scribbles, these notes and screams, the replies, the agonizing questions, the cursing, the bleeding words, and the cutting sentences, all of which lie in me. Like a bomb ready to explode, but left burning at the top of its fuse, feeling like it’s gonna implode but never getting to. The bomb that needs to be ripped open, the one that needs to break, shatter, burn just to have fulfilled the need of what it is: a bomb. These thoughts, all they are are thoughts so why can I feel them all over my body, a paralyzing sense of nothing, but everything, black, but white, yes, but no, questioning but affirming, pushing everything in but trying to pull everything out. Why is it so uneasy? Why is it so hard, but why is it so soft? Why is it crawling in my insides like a spider left in a jar? Like a hundred thoughts bouncing from side to side pushing up against my skin trying to squeeze its way through the surface but always bouncing right back. Is it a force field? That keeps all the anger, the rage, the pain, the frustration, the endless sensations that cannot be put into words. The thoughts, the ones that no one knows what they say, not even the holder, not even the singular person thinking them knows, so why are they there crying to be taken out, crying for an escape, for an explosion, for an… exit. These are truly unthinkable thoughts left to reside in me, the unlucky holder of the unthinkable thoughts
By: Anonymous
