Confused Heart
Approximately after 2yrs of healing, not allowing myself to fall in love or to get hurt at any point. I felt that I was ready to be out there, but not quite; I gave myself 6 months before the year ended with discovering if I was really ready. Months passed by so quickly in the snap of a finger until 3 months before 2021 ended. I met you while being out with a friend. At first, I didn’t think of anything out of it; it was just a regular day. Until the next week, after we started talking to each other every single day, I wouldn’t lie. It felt good to talk to someone, and that somehow made my day. However, fear, worry, name it all started to kick in because I was scared to get hurt. The feeling of falling in love was such a foreign feeling as if I had never felt it before. I don’t know what to do, and I’m scared because of it. I wish that you would somehow figure it out because I know in myself that no matter how strong I foil for you, I would never confess my feelings to you. Even myself, I don’t know how you feel. All I know is that I want to be by your side. Despite our differences, we are still trying to know each other even better.
Still, a few days ago, we had a misunderstanding just because I was expressing myself to you, but that made me feel even more confused because at one point you are sweet, present and one you are totally the opposite. Mi Corazón, you are giving me mixed signals, knowing that it’s still early in our relationship. Please enlighten me on what exactly are we, because I don’t want to end up being left out or hurt. If this “thing” won’t work out as early as now, let’s end it because I don’t want us to end up hurting each other, I’d rather keep you as a friend than end up in a negative situation. However, I am still hopeful that we can still sort things out despite our differences and the struggles we face individually. Yet, I am and will be hoping we can compromise for us, and I will hold on as long as I can.
By L.E.Y